Check out the weekly article below by one of our ministry partners Donna McKinley, founder of McKinley Reports.

by Donna Funderburke McKinley

According to a recent study, American youth say they get little or no information from their parents about sexual issues. With the United States, and all its vast resources, having the highest rates of teen pregnancies and births in the western industrialized world, something is seriously wrong. No longer can parents continue a “don’t ask, don’t tell” attitude. They must take the initiative to educate themselves and their children.

Parents of teens often worry about pregnancies. However, parents should be concerned that the same lifestyle that may cause pregnancy can also cause death. In the U.S., millions of teens are diagnosed yearly with sexually transmitted diseases (STD). Many STDs cause death or are incurable.

Contraceptives do not prevent pregnancies or STDs 100%.. Abstinence is the only 100 percent effective pregnancy and STD prevention. In addition, birth control information does not protect a teen from the heartache and victimization that comes from early sexual involvement.

A well-informed parent makes well-informed decisions.

And, a well-informed teen is the best deterrent to heartache in their life.

Facts: Teens living in the south and in rural areas were more likely to experience sexual intercourse. (True Love Waits) A 2000 Seventeen Magazine survey revealed that 55% of teens ages 15-19, admitted to engaging in oral sex. Many teens practicing oral and anal sex (on the increase) say they consider this as saving themselves until marriage. Some think they cannot get pregnant with anal sex (there is a  chance of pregnancy with anal sex). Oral sexually transmitted diseases among teens are often more common than genital STDs. Condoms fail about 4 out of 10 times when used by teens to prevent pregnancy. (National Physicians Center for Family Resources,; “Questions Kids Ask About SEX and How Parents Can Respond”) Condoms have not been proven effective against the spread of diseases transmitted through direct contact (skin to skin). These diseases include Syphilis, Herpes, and Human Pappillomavirus (HPV). Health on the Net (www.hon.ch) reports that according to a new national survey by the Society for Adolescent Medicine, among college students who live away from home, 56% had been sexually active while attending college, and 73% of that group reported having unprotected sex while in college. An online survey of 516 students found that 68% of those who had unprotected sex did not believe they were at risk of contracting an STD. (http://www.hon.ch/News/HSN/514693.html) One in twelve children is no longer a virgin by his or her 13th birthday (National Center for Health Statistics), 21% of 9th graders have slept with four or more partners  (National Center for Health Statistics), and 73% of 12-14 year olds who lost their virginity said they wished they’d waited. (National Center to Prevent Teen Pregnancy survey) Between 1991 and 2004, there have been more than 143,000 teen births in Alabama. Each year, 750,000 to 850,000 teenage women in the United States experience pregnancy. (CDC) In 1999, the most recent year for which data is available, over 148,000 teenage pregnancies ended in abortion. (Elam-Evans LD et al. Abortion surveillance, United States, 1999. Morbidity & Mortality Weekly Report, Surveillance Summaries 2002; 51(SS- 9):1-28.) Twenty-eight out of 37 worldwide studies have determined that there is, in fact, a link between abortion and breast cancer (National Physicians Center for Family Resources), and 8,219 teens every day, 342 teens every hour, one teen every 10 seconds contracts an STD! Each year, 5.5 million new cases of HPV, Human Papillomavirus, the virus that causes genital warts are reported. HPV is the leading cause of cervical cancer. With little or no symptoms for females and no medical test that will reveal the disease, females often find they are infected too late. (National Physicians Center) By age 50, at least 80 percent of women will have acquired genital HPV infection. (CDC)

Parenting Pointers

Studies show that teens with strong emotional attachments to their parents are less likely to become sexually active at an early age. Be open and accessible to your children. Open communication and involvement in their activities, school and friends are essential for a happy, well-rounded child. Spend more time together. According to the second Nickelodeon/TIME magazine study on the state of kids today, kids still crave parent’s time and attention. One-third of kids say they want to spend more time with their moms and nearly half said they want more time with their dads. Establish chores as well as clear rules and guidelines. Children must learn responsibility and understand there are consequences for their actions. Make children face their mistakes. Do not rush to “fix” their problem for them. Be consistent with discipline. Get to know your children’s friends and their friends’ parents. Friends have a strong influence on children. Know their family’s values.

Many parents encourage girls to wear makeup and dress appealing at a young age: Do not rush your child into growing up. Their youth is the only innocent time they will have. Let your child enjoy the carefree days of childhood. Do not label your young child’s opposite-sex friends as boy/girl friends. At an early age, children often learn from their parents that being noticed by the opposite sex is supposed to be exciting. This teaches children to strive for that “special” attention. Delay dating. Studies show, the earlier the dating experience, the earlier the sexual experience. In addition, early dating or boy/girl relationships rob children of valuable time and opportunity to learn how to develop friendships with same-sex friends. Often times when youth “go together,” they exclude same-sex friends. Break-ups are devastating and they find their friends have long since left them to develop other friendships. Limit and monitor television shows, movies, music, books, and Internet. Today’s entertainment industry is mainly geared toward relationships, sex, and dating. Such “entertainment” will prompt pre-teens and young teens into areas they are not emotionally mature enough to handle. Instead, involve your children in sports, dance, art, church and community.

Majority of parents state they know little or nothing about the person their teen is dating: Always meet the person that your teen is dating or intending to date. Encourage time spent at your home, under supervision. Make sure both teens know what you as a parent expect. Keep strict curfews and dress codes; too much time alone only encourages intimacy and familiarity that facilitate early sexual involvement. Allow your child to date only someone close in age.

Studies show that many U.S. teens say their religion kept them from drinking, drugs, and sex: Contact churches in your area. Find out what activities they offer children and teens. Encourage the entire family to attend. Strong morals and values will take the family a long way!

RESOURCES:

“Prescriptions For Parents: A  Physicians’ Guide To Adolescence And Sex.” This interactive CD-ROM is based on The National Physicians Center For Family Resources’ best-selling resource for parents and health educators, Sex Q&A: Kids’ Questions- Parents’ Answers. This interactive CD turns your home computer into a parenting resource center. Narration, video, animation and text combine to form an easy-to-understand yet powerful educational tool that provides medically-accurate information on adolescent development and sexual health.

RESOURCES FOR TEENS:

I Gave Dating a Chance” & “He’s Hot, She’s Hot: What to Look for in the Opposite Sex,” both books by Jeramy Clark

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